Chronicles of a Hot Mess Soccer Mom: Volume 2
Soccer Saturdays
Chapter 1: The morning rush, yet again. It's a crisp Saturday morning, and the alarm didn't go off. I bolt from bed, realizing I have 15 minutes to get these kids dressed, fed, and out the door for the earliest game of the season. In the kitchen, I throw together a breakfast of cereal milk, but not before accidentally spilling half the box on the floor. Tank, our chocolate lab, looks delighted, and I can only manage a groan as I scoop it up while encouraging Tank to live his best life with the Cinnamon Toast Crunch cereal.
Chapter 2: Uniform Shenanigans. After a frantic search for the team's matching jersey, I discovered, surprise, it's in the laundry basket. You would think that after years of soccer Saturdays, my children would remember to put their soccer uniforms and socks in the washing machine when we get home. Instead, I am met with, “Oh, I forgot” or “I thought I did”. The bright yellow shirt has somehow turned a lovely shade of orange from that mystery stain that I am now trying to scrub off with a little spray and wash and wishes. Chase looks at me with wide eyes, and I assure him that it's all about the spirit and that he should have tossed it in the washer. Give it a 5-second funeral and let’s move on. “It's a unique style” I proclaim, as I shove them into the car, donning their mismatched socks and 1adidas slide that is two sizes too big and the other assize too small. FOR THE LOVE…OY VEY!
Chapter 3: The Drive of Madness. We hopped into the car only to realize that we had forgotten the soccer backpacks and snack bags back inside. Why did I think having both snack days on the same day was a good idea? As I dive back into the vehicle, I find both kids missing from the car. They went back inside. Brooklyn is fixing her hair, again. And Chase, I have no idea what he is looking for but insists he has to have it. 5 minutes later, it was his new favorite Pokémon card on his dresser. Wait, quick, double check we have cleats and shin guards, so we don’t have a repeat of last week.
Chapter 4: The Spectator Sport. As the game kicks off, I juggle my duties of spectating, snapping photos and live streaming for family members who couldn't make it. I cheer, cringe, and gasp at the unexpected tumble and near goal. The mom next to me, hands me a cup of coffee, and I take a grateful slip, only discover its an Irish Coffee, surprise, not sure if it'll give me the energy boost I need, but I'll take it. This is why these moms are so cheerful and carefree in the morning. Mental note, drive with hubby next time, so I can be carefree also.
Chapter 6: Snack Time Negotiations. The game finally ends, and emotions run high. Some kids are ecstatic, others are defeated during the postgame huddle. One of the kids break down into tears because someone got two orange slices while they only got one. I step in as the mediator, because his mom is sitting back being carefree, offering Snack Diplomacy, which, after much negotiation, leads to sharing the remaining gummy bears I found in my purse.
Chapter 7: The Road Home. After enough postgame chatter, we pile back into the car, and I realize I've forgotten half my sanity on the field. I promised myself I'll go back for it next week, assuming I can remember HAHA. The drive home involves a series of knock, knock jokes, the worst kind. 10 minutes into the drive, Chase passed out and Brooklyn is planning the rest of her weekend. We laugh about how crazy our morning was, and we have high hopes next week will run smoother….yeah right!
Chapter 8: Evening Reflections. We finally returned home, triumphant yet exhausted. I discovered that pizza is the only suitable dinner option because both hubby and I were exhausted. So, we gather around the table and recount the day's events, laughing over the mismatched cleats and snack trades. My kid smiles. Reminds me that this hot mess life is precisely what we signed up for. Chaotic, amusing, and drenched in love
Epilog: Perfectly Imperfect. Embracing my role as a hot mass soccer mom means letting go of perfection and finding joy in the unpredictable moments. We curl up on the couch later that night, my husband and I with a glass of wine and the kids with their popcorn bowls, and celebrate surviving another game day while watching funny videos on YouTube. As I snuggle my babies, I remind myself that laughter, love, and little memories are what truly matters amidst the chaos.
Till next time,
Janthina
